The peanut butter sandwich that changed everything was objectively terrible—stale bread, cement-thick filling—but I was sitting at 4,247 feet with steam rising from my socks when the math finally added up: thirty-eight years of carrying weight that was never mine to begin with. The sandwich was terrible—stale bread, cement-like peanut butter—but I was sitting on this waterlogged piece of wood with steam rising off my socks, and I felt lighter than I had in years. My feet were destroyed, my shoulders ached from carrying twelve pounds that …
When Exhaustion Looks Like Failure
There’s a weight that settles in quietly, the kind that doesn’t announce itself but slowly seeps into everything you do—or don’t do. It’s not about hitting rock bottom or having some grand breakdown. It’s the slow erosion of energy until even the smallest things—like standing under running water, or eating something real —feel out of reach. The to-do lists pile up, the plans circle around and around, but nothing moves forward. It’s tempting to call this laziness. But that’s a lie we tell ourselves when we’re too tired to hold the …
I Don’t Climb to Reach the Summit. I Climb So I Don’t Abandon Myself Halfway.
Most people think the challenge is the mountain. It isn’t.The real challenge is staying with yourself when it gets hard—when your body wants to stop, when your mind starts spinning stories, and when walking away would be so much easier than walking forward.This isn’t a story about summits. It’s about the distance between who I’ve been and who I’m becoming—measured one uneven, breathless step at a time. I’ve done seven Himalayan treks in the past fifteen and a half months.Not because I’m an adrenaline junkie or looking for transformation. I …
Quiet Work, Loud Returns
There are no lights. No music. Just a stubborn chair and the kind of work that waits in silence, asking who you are when no one’s clapping. The coffee’s cold again. The inbox is piling up. That project you felt proud of last week is now a quiet weight. Still, you return. Not out of obligation, but because something in you knows this is where real things are made—in the ordinary, unglamorous middle. This stretch never makes the highlight reel. Not the launch. Not the win. Just the quiet continuity where doubt lingers and progress hides. …
The Message I Never Sent—And the Identity I Built Instead
At 2:43 PM, my thumb froze mid-scroll, suspended above a message I knew too well. Not because it was cruel. It was kind. Polite. Safe. But my chest tightened. A beat skipped. My body braced itself like it had done this before—and knew what was coming. The message was ready. Three drafts in. Phrased with precision—neutral enough to avoid vulnerability, warm enough to keep the door cracked. I’d written this kind of message too many times. Polished. Performative. Just apologetic enough to look mature, just detached enough to avoid …
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The Courage to Sit with Yourself
Not every breakthrough looks like a summit. Sometimes it’s just staying still. Silence doesn’t always feel calm. Sometimes it presses in. The kind of silence that arrives when plans fall through, when your phone runs out of battery, when the day ends too early and you're not ready to face yourself. No screens. No background noise. Just you. We aren’t taught how to handle that kind of stillness. We’re trained to chase momentum, to measure meaning in milestones. Ordinary moments get treated like filler—as if life is a waiting room and …
I Don’t Want to Be the Version of Me That Gets Applause
People liked her. She was agreeable. Reliable. Great in a group photo and even better at conflict avoidance. If someone needed emotional CPR, she’d do it with a smile and a spreadsheet. People said she had boundaries. What they didn’t know was that she’d just stopped asking for anything. That version of me could defuse a room in ten words or less. She knew how to tuck her needs under the rug, flatten every reaction, and leave a conversation looking like it never scratched her. Clean. Contained. Pleasant. But pleasant is a trap. It’s how …
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Should I Stay or Should I Go? Why the Hardest Decisions Don’t Fit Neatly on a Mood Board
I. The Exit Myth We love an exit. Especially a well-timed, sharply worded one. The kind that gets a standing ovation in a boardroom or a viral quote block on Instagram. “Know your worth,” it says. “Walk away from what doesn’t serve you.” We cheer. We repost. We crave the empowerment of decisive departures. But real life isn’t an airport departure board. Sometimes, the only way to tell if you’re making the right decision is by living through the wrong one. I’ve left jobs that looked great on paper. Walked out of relationships where love …