Doubt has a way of creeping in, whispering that I should be different—stronger, smarter, less me. For years, I listened.
Not anymore. Overthinking doesn’t solve problems; it just makes them bigger. So instead of spiraling into Why is this happening? or Am I overreacting?, I ask better questions.
What part of this is mine to fix?
Not who’s to blame? or why does this keep happening? Those lead nowhere.
A better question: What’s actually in my control? And what’s just an old pattern playing out again?
Trying to control others is like yelling at the weather. My time is better spent on what I can change—my responses, my boundaries, my expectations.
What am I done negotiating?
Some things aren’t up for debate. I write them down so I don’t forget.
Respect isn’t optional. My feelings are valid. I won’t pour energy into fixing what was broken before I got there.
If I don’t set my non-negotiables, everything becomes negotiable.
Am I asking for what I need or hoping they’ll just know?
Most of my past frustrations could have been avoided if I had just said the thing instead of waiting for someone to notice.
People don’t notice—not because they don’t care, but because they’re not me. If something matters, I say it. If I need reassurance, I ask. And if I have to keep explaining why I deserve the bare minimum, I take that as my answer.
What’s one small way I can show up for myself today?
Not in a change-your-whole-life way. Just something simple and doable—shutting down self-criticism, reaching out to a friend, drinking more water.
I don’t have to fix everything at once. I just need to do one thing that reminds me I’m worth showing up for.
And when doubt comes knocking? I let it talk to itself while I move on with my day.
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