My Musings – Page 4 – Not your ordinary tales

The Voice in My Head Thinks I’m an Idiot (And Other Lies It Tells Me)

It starts with a whisper. A tiny, nagging thought. You’re going to mess this up. Before I know it, the whisper turns into a full-scale production. Everyone can see through you. You should probably disappear into the woods and live among creatures that don’t judge. For years, this voice had all the authority of a Supreme Court ruling. It dictated what was true: If anxiety showed up, that meant I wasn’t ready. If envy flared, that meant I was failing. If guilt sank its claws in, that meant I was a terrible person. The voice never considered …

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When Self-Doubt Knocks, Don’t Answer

Doubt has a way of creeping in, whispering that I should be different—stronger, smarter, less me. For years, I listened. Not anymore. Overthinking doesn’t solve problems; it just makes them bigger. So instead of spiraling into Why is this happening? or Am I overreacting?, I ask better questions. What part of this is mine to fix? Not who’s to blame? or why does this keep happening? Those lead nowhere. A better question: What’s actually in my control? And what’s just an old pattern playing out again? Trying to control others is like …

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One Life, Wild Trails: Breaking Free on Himalayan Peaks

It might sound strange, but the best decision I ever made looked like a huge mistake to everyone else. I had a steady routine and a clear plan for the future. Yet, deep down, I felt trapped—like being stuck in a windowless room. I knew something had to change, so I left it all behind and headed for the Indian Himalayas. The first few days on the trail were a brutal wake-up call. My pack felt stuffed with rocks, and every steep stretch pushed me to my limits. My legs burned, and each blister made me question my sanity. Even in that struggle, …

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When Love Feels Like Chasing a Ghost

There’s nothing more maddening than loving someone who keeps slipping through your fingers. You reach, they pull away. You beg, they stay—for a while. But just when you start to believe things might finally be different, they disappear again. Not physically, but emotionally. They vanish into silence, detachment, indifference. And every time, you tell yourself it’s the last time you’ll beg, the last time you’ll believe their promises. But somehow, you still do. It’s a dance that’s as intoxicating as it is devastating: the anxious partner …

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The Great Illusion of “Rational” Decisions

Most people like to think their decisions are driven by logic and reason. We convince ourselves that we carefully consider all options, weigh the pros and cons, and make choices based on facts. In reality? Most of those decisions—especially the important ones—are led by something much less objective: our opinions. These aren't the well-thought-out opinions that come from experience or reflection. They’re the gut-level opinions, shaped by past experiences, biases, emotions, and, sometimes, our egos. These opinions look a lot like rational …

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Clearing the Clutter: Letting Grief In

The room was still, quiet in that way that makes you aware of every sound—the creak of the floorboards, the soft hum of the fridge, the tapping of a distant keyboard. She sat on the couch, staring at the blank wall in front of her. The emptiness around her wasn’t the kind that could be filled with noise or distractions. It was the kind of silence that pulls you inward, forcing you to face things you’ve been ignoring. She hadn’t planned to cry today. It wasn’t on the list. But grief had a way of sneaking up, like it always did. She’d spent …

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