reflections

The Love You’re Chasing Isn’t Love at All

Ever noticed how the relationships you obsess over have a common theme? They always involve someone who is never fully available. Not completely out of reach, but never quite there either. It’s a special kind of torture. The almost-but-not-quite dynamic. The late replies, the mixed signals, the flashes of connection that disappear just as quickly. And yet, you stay. Why? Because there’s something intoxicating about that space in between. The gap between who they are and who they could be. Between what the relationship is and what it …

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The Static and the Signal

There’s a moment right before I make a bad decision. A split second where I hear it—that quiet voice. The one that says, “Don’t do this.” But then, like clockwork, the noise arrives. A barrage of justifications, doubts, second-guessing. And just like that, the signal is lost in the static. This has happened more times than I’d like to admit. Like the time I said yes to a project that felt off from day one. The client was vague, the timelines made no sense, and something in my gut clenched when I read their email. But my mind jumped in with …

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The Only Way Forward Is Alone

I thought the hardest part of walking away was the leaving itself. That moment when you turn your back, hands shaking, stomach twisted, hoping someone will stop you. But that’s not it. The hardest part isn’t leaving. It’s everything that comes after. No one warns you about the silence. It’s deafening at first. When those first few steps are taken alone, the world doesn’t immediately rush in to fill the space left behind. There’s just an empty stretch ahead, filled with uncertainty, and the crushing realization that no one is coming to …

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All or Nothing, Done Right

There’s a moment, right before the final push, when everything inside starts screaming to stop. The summit is right there, 100 steps away, but those 100 steps stretch into 10,000. The pack on my back, a mere 6 kilos, swells into an unbearable 100. My mind turns against me, whispering all the reasons why this was a bad idea to begin with. Every time, the battle is the same. Every time, the answer is the same. Keep going. Not because someone is watching. Not because there’s applause waiting at the end. Not because of some grand meaning …

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