Mastering your emotions is the ultimate superpower. It’s really hard to stop yourself from feeling a certain way in any given moment.
We have all experienced that sinking feeling in the stomach, when we overreact to certain impulses. We do feel bad in the moment but our feelings intensify once we fathom the aftermath of how we reacted. This is accompanied by a sense of guilt and shame. Even when we know that it was someone else’s wrongdoing, we feel terrible in reciprocating the behaviour.
These emotions are shit hard to brush off. And even if you are successful, it does leave a negative toll on your mental and emotional state in the long run.
I suffer from anxiety and rumination which always makes handling such issues that much harder. After many heartbreaks and buckets full of tears, I believe I’ve finally discovered a solution. And it’s so simple – EMPATHY. Instead of focusing on “what/how” the person is saying/behaving, focus on the “why”. Create your own narrative on what the other person must be going through to behave/react in such a way. Even better, put yourself in his/her shoes. Once we (try to) understand the struggles the other person is going through, it becomes easier to empathize with them or the situation.
But honestly, I’m trying to change for my own well-being. There comes a time when we have to be radically honest with ourselves and admit that by giving in these circumstances, we are sabotaging our own happiness. The question we should be asking is – “Is getting upset about this issue worth my time and energy?”
I’m no saint. There are times when I let my emotions get the better of me. It’s easy and even comforting to get mad and yell in the heat of the moment. Kinda like eating chocolates and cake and binge watching when you are feeling low. Even when we completely understand the side-effects of these actions.
Mastering your emotions is a hard skill and something which requires deliberate practice. But it is definitely worth working on. So, next time when you encounter someone who is having a bad day, try to be a little extra nice to them. Be empathetic, Be human. I hope this brings some peace into your life.
codybecth says
Great Article! Thank you for sharing this is a very informative post, and looking forward to the latest one